Conflict Resolution Day is a day that ought to receive more recognition. Almost everyone struggles with conflict sometimes, but how can we best promote conflict resolution and help bring more peace into the world?
In 2005, the Association for Conflict Resolution (ACR) decreed that the third Thursday of October be set aside every year to “promote and celebrate peaceful conflict resolution practices worldwide.” It’s also intended as a day to recognize the significant contributions that peaceful conflict resolvers make to their governments, communities, clients, and within their own families. This year, Conflict Resolution Day falls on October 19, 2017.
Conflict resolution begins at home
In order to be a skillful resolver of conflict in your community, whether you decide to use your degree in the legal, educational, business, or mental health field, you first have to be adept at resolving conflict in your own personal relationships. Christians are reminded in Matthew 7:5: “First take the log out of your eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.”
In keeping with ACR’s commitment to promoting broader awareness of creative, peaceful means of resolving conflict in the month of October, here are four tips for approaching your own conflicts in a God-honoring way. While you can’t ever totally avoid them as you move through life and bump up against other people’s perceptions, wounds, and defenses, it is possible to use conflicts as faith-growing tools of mutual healing. Committing yourself to finding peaceful resolutions to conflicts with others can help you grow emotionally stronger and more resilient while simultaneously cultivating more fruitful and fulfilling interpersonal relationships.
1. Glorify God
Peacemaker Ministries notes that one of the most important foundational principles of Christian conciliation is to use the conflict with another to glorify and honor God “by trusting him, obeying him, and imitating him (see Prov. 3:4-6; John 14:15; Eph. 5:1).” Ask yourself, “How can I please and honor the Lord in this situation?” Ask God, “How can I love and value the person with whom I am experiencing conflict as Your unique creation?”
2. Exercise Self-control
Plan your words and responses carefully and deliberately, avoiding impulsiveness and expressions of anger. Call to mind Proverbs 29:11: “A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man holds it in check.” Rehearse what you plan to say, and anticipate likely reactions. Be discerning about choosing the right time and place to initiate the difficult conversation.
3. Listen as Much as You Speak
Listen carefully and acknowledge each other’s feelings and perceptions. Don't dwell on old issues or get derailed with topics not directly related to the conversation. Brainstorm ways to resolve the problem, ask for feedback about your role in the disharmony, and pray together, if appropriate.
4. Be Fully Reconciled
God calls Christians to forgive others totally in the same way that they are constantly forgiven for transgressions.
For a deep and lasting peace that endures, find inspiration in Ken Sande’s four powerful promises of forgiveness:
1. “I will not dwell on this incident.”
2. “I will not bring up this incident again and use it against you.”
3. “I will not talk to others about this incident.”
4. “I will not let this incident stand between us or hinder our personal relationship.”
Conflict resolution is not always easy, but it is very valuable. Take some time to think on how you can improve your conflict resolution skills and endeavor to facilitate peaceful relationships.
If you’d like to learn more about the biblically based, Christ-centered education at Geneva, we’d love to introduce you to Christian perspectives at work in the field of Human Services. For more information on how Geneva College can help you pursue your goals for a career in Human Services, please phone us at 855-979-5563 or email web@geneva.edu
Opinions expressed in the Geneva Blog are those of its contributors and do not necessarily represent the opinions or official position of the College. The Geneva Blog is a place for faculty and contributing writers to express points of view, academic insights, and contribute to national conversations to spark thought, conversation, and the pursuit of truth, in line with our philosophy as a Christian, liberal arts institution.
Oct 17, 2017
Faithful Doubt: Habakkuk, written by pastor Travis Scott, explores the short prophetic book of Habakkuk, in a practical and meaningful way through the lens of a doubter. Travis approaches the passage of scripture from an honest and humble perspective, recalling difficulties experienced as a husband, father, and pastor.
Dr. J. Ligon Duncan of Reformed Theological Seminary delivered the spring 2021 Commencement address at Geneva College on May 10, 2021. Here is an excerpt of that message, entitled, "Every Good Work," from 2 Timothy 3. This excerpt first appeared in the Summer 2021 edition of Geneva Magazine.
When the Bible teaches one thing and your “instincts,” as it were, disagree, whose wisdom do you trust, your own or God’s? Do we really need to be told not to trust in our own minds? Yes, because we want to trust ourselves, and because in our day putatively wise people constantly tell us that high self-esteem brings success.
When the Bible teaches one thing and your “instincts,” as it were, disagree, whose wisdom do you trust, your own or God’s? Do we really need to be told not to trust in our own minds? Yes, because we want to trust ourselves, and because in our day putatively wise people constantly tell us that high self-esteem brings success.
As busy as college students are, it can be profoundly beneficial for them to seek out and engage in a routine Bible study. Diving deeper into their faith, exploring what the world’s challenges mean to them, and creating a Christian-based path forward can give any college student the direction he or she needs to achieve their best life. Still, it’s not always easy to make that decision—instead of a night with friends or yet another study session for a high-level math class, go to Bible study instead.
Handing our cares and worries over to God gives us peace which keeps us from falling into doubt, as stated in Philippians. "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God."
What should someone with wealth do? Solomon writes, “Pay attention to it and know its condition.” He uses the example of sheep and goats. Wise parents blessed with wealth will teach their children how to work to maintain it. Wise children will accept the burdens of responsibility that go with family wealth, always remembering that riches do not last forever.
The Book of Proverbs has no use for the gullible, viewing them as willful fools. Even when everyone else can see a hateful, deceitful person for what he is, the gullible choose to believe gracious words.
At Easter, a good question to ask is, "How are people saved?" This should be a question that Christians can easily answer, and indeed most can. However, sometimes Christians are less knowledgeable about the doctrine of justification and its important distinctions than perhaps they should be.
How should leaders deal with difficult situations in difficult times? Geneva College’s John Gallo and Jenna Bieber provide a guidebook for leaders. "Lessons from Cain and Abel to Guide Leaders Through Turbulent Times" walks readers through the account of Cain and Abel to teach leaders the importance of justice, mercy, harmony and equality.
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